Differing Political Views As A Couple and How To Handle The Conflict

As a couple, you’re going to have plenty of differing opinions. You might not like all of the same foods, music, or movies. Things like that are often easy to move past. However, politics tend to be different when it comes to relationship conflict. 

Having differing political views can sometimes create tension in your relationship, especially when those differences are highlighted — like during an election year. 

There are plenty of couples across the country who don’t share the same political views. They might vote differently. They might have different belief systems or think this country needs to move in a specific direction. Sound familiar? 

Having a different political stance from your partner doesn’t mean your relationship needs to feel strained. But it’s important to find healthy ways to handle the conflict. 

Be Respectful

Perhaps the most important thing you can do when you have different political views is to lead with respect. You might not want to make politics a topic of conversation every day, but it’s also not something you should feel like you need to avoid. 

It’s okay to have healthy disagreements with your partner. In fact, arguing the “right” way can end up making your relationship stronger. But, these disagreements need to be respectful. If you want them to listen to your views, give them the same courtesy. 

Don’t Make Assumptions

Instead of stereotyping your partner’s political views, be curious about them. There are obviously many things you love about this person, so maybe you’ve made some misconceptions about what their political views really mean. 

That doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything but don’t immediately close off your mind because of what you’ve seen on the news or heard from other people in that same political party. This is a person you love and care about. Don’t make assumptions about what they really believe just because they have a political label you disagree with. 

Be an Active Listener

When someone you care about disagrees with your political views, it can be tempting to want to convince them otherwise. You’ll probably want to do most of the talking. But it’s just as important to be an active listener. 

Active listening is about more than just hearing what your partner has to say. Let them know you are truly taking the time to understand them. Even if you still don’t agree with everything, it can help you see where they’re coming from, and it will make them know you truly care about their thoughts and opinions. 

Take a Breath

Political discussions can become heated quickly. If you and your partner are both passionate about politics, take a step back and give yourself time and space before reacting to what they have to say. 

Going with your gut reaction might cause you to say something you’ll later regret. It’s okay to tell your partner you need to take a few minutes to cool down before coming back to the conversation. It’s important to remain level-headed so you can have a meaningful discussion and not just an argument. 

Remember You’re On the Same Team

Even if you don’t have the same political views as your partner, it doesn’t mean you have to be in opposition in other areas of life. Remember, you’re with this person for a reason. Your differences can end up making you a stronger couple if you’re willing to work through them instead of giving up because you think your views are too different. 

Sometimes, working with a neutral third party can help. If you’re having a hard time handling the conflict that arises from political differences, consider reaching out for marriage therapy to learn how to better communicate.